Two Wolves -- A Cherokee Parable

An old Cherokee chief was teaching his grandson about life...

"A fight is going on inside me," he said to the boy.

"It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves.
"One is evil - he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, self-doubt, and ego.

"The other is good - he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.


"This same fight is going on inside you - and inside every other person, too."



The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather,


"Which wolf will win?"

The old chief simply replied,


"The one you feed."


Author Unknown

What's more hurtful....

Having parents who just can't be bothered or having no parents?

The reality of life in 2009

2009 has proven to be a crap year where the economy is concerned. For a lot of people, 2009 symbolizes loss, frustration and sometimes despair… *sigh* I thought this was the Chinese year of the Brown Cow which was supposed to symbolize good fortune, health etc.

Listening to the Christmas Wishlist on 94.7 Highveld Stereo in the mornings on my way to work, I realize just how blessed we are. Both my husband and I have good and secure jobs. We each have our own car. We have a beautiful house and we have food on the table every night. We have a gorgeous, healthy, almost 2 year old son and I am 32 weeks pregnant with our second son. So far, touch wood, my pregnancy has been smooth sailing and the doctor estimated that this little one will be a healthy 3.8kg at birth.

So many times, we take things for granted. Being able to buy a take away for lunch or buying a new dress for a function seems to be normal to some of us. We complain that living costs have gone through the roof, yet we get in our luxury sedan every morning and go to a job we hate. We complain with the white bread under the arm.

Look around you. Look at all the things you’ve got and tonight, when you tug your healthy child into bed, go down on your knees and say a prayer for those less fortunate than you and say thank you to God for all your privileges.

The Pregnant Conversation

I am almost 32 weeks pregnant and I’ve noticed the general pregnant conversation while talking to one of our producers the other day. It goes something like this:
Pregnant Fairy 1: When are you due?
Pregnant Fairy 2: Mid January. And you?
Pregnant Fairy 1: End of February. Do you know if it’s a boy or a girl?
Pregnant Fairy 2: It’s a boy….again. What are you having?
Pregnancy Fairy 1: A girl
Pregnant pause – excuse the pun
Pregnant Fairy 2: Do you have any names yet?
Pregnant Fairy 1: Yes we’re thinking either Lola or Peaches
Another pregnant pause while Pregnant Fairy 2 thinks of a diplomatic response.
Pregnant Fairy 2: Oh! *thinks, “Good grief, my dog’s name is Lola”.*
Pregnant Fairy 1: Do you have any names yet?
Pregnant Fairy 2: No, but we are working on it. *thinks ”and we are seriously considering NORMAL names”*
Pregnant Fairy 1: Are you going for normal birth or caesarean?
Pregnant Fairy 2: Caesarean
Pregnant Fairy 1: I’m going for a normal birth..actually natural, no drugs!

Conversation runs dry.
The end.

20 Things I've learnt since becoming a mother

It is amazing to think what you can learn from or about babies, children and life in general once you've become a mom. Here are 20 things I've learnt in the last 21 months.

1. To appreciate my own mother more. It could not have been easy for her to have a full time job and take care of my brother and me PLUS be a housekeeper, cook and wife. (I only work a three quarter day, so I'm blessed)

2. That life really only starts once your first child is born.

3. Children add value to life, they don't take value away. I can't understand why some people are scared to have children.

4. Seeing children suffer or being ill feels like having open heart surgery without the anesthesia.

5. Life is not about you anymore.

6. Multitasking is a new skill all of a sudden. You can hold the baby and make tea or a sandwich without messing it up.

7. Dinner can be re-heated and still taste the same....cold dinner is also ok.

8. Cold coffee / tea and flat fizzy drinks don't taste THAT bad.

9. You can look good without make-up and blowdried hair.

10. Time is not your own and definately not your to control. You can plan to the closest 5 minutes, you will always be late because your baby / toddler decides to puke on you or have a stinky nappy 5 minutes before you need to leave the house.

11. The inside of your car will never be clean again.....until they move out of the house that is.

12. Until your kids are old enough to wash their own grubby little paws, you will ALWAYS have a sticky handprint somewhere on your clothes.

13. Murphy's Law: children always get sick in the middle of the night when you either have no meds for them or you can not get to a doctor.

14. A GP does just as brilliant job as any Peadiatrician (who charges a fortune for a 5 minute consultation).

15. Going away for a weekend entails lots and lots of luggage. You either use the entire area of your dubble-cab or you use a trailer.

16. A queen size bed doesn't mean enough space for 2 adults and a toddler.

17. A shower can be done in 5 minutes....bye-bye long showers.

18. Patience is underrated (thanks for that one, K!)

19. A single smile from you baby/ child can take away sadness and anger.

20. How to love unconditionally!

Being a good mother

Tucking my 20 month old son into bed, I kissed him on the forehead and looked down on his angelic face and I realized that I am truly blessed.
Not only am I blessed to have such a beautiful and healthy boy, but I am also blessed in what life has taught me in the last 20 months.
When a baby is born, so is a mother…. That said, nothing can prepare you for what awaits you in the wonderful world of motherhood. You can read as many books as you like, attend as many “Parenting Workshops” possible and even ask advice from the specialist, but NOTHING can prepare you for the sleepless nights, the Gastro nappies, projectile vomiting and most of all, the judgment of society.
While I’m sitting here, blogging (which by the way, I still can’t believe I’m doing) about motherhood, I can’t help to wonder if I am a good mother and what exactly makes you a good mother in the eyes of society.


WHAT MAKES YOU A GOOD MOTHER?
Society believes that being a good mother is when you follow the norm on things like starting solid foods, introducing cow’s milk, getting your baby to sleep through, oh and the list goes on. Of course, getting your toddler to eat enough vegetables and limiting television is also among the “rules”. But why should we follow the rules of society and actually care what society thinks of us as mothers? Screw society, follow your gut! I get frown upon by my peers because I’m an “alternative mother”, if there even is such a thing. I allow my son to have a packet of crisps an hour before supper. I allow him to watch TV until he falls asleep at 20h00 (yes 20h00) and I even allow him to have chocolate for breakfast if he feels like it. But I also set boundaries, which one day, he will thank me for.
With society judging us on our abilities as mothers, it is important to remember that not everything society says is right. Society may think I’m a fair or good mother, but to my kid, I’m a GREAT mom.

The beginning...

Chatting to friends about blogging has got me thinking. Why do people blog? Is "blog" even an actual word? There are so many questions about blogging that it is insane.

I've never been a fan of blogging. I have to admit, I've never, until recently, read someone else's blog. I've never even considered starting my own blog, until today. And here I am....blogging. What about I'm not entirely sure. If people will actually read my blog is also an uncertainty. What I am certain about it that blogging is maybe what I've been waiting to do all year. Maybe, through blogging, I can fill this little empty hole I have. I'm not a creative person...never was, never will be. But maybe, just maybe.....

Anyway, seeing how easy blogging can really be, my views on it has changed. So, watch this space and be entertained...or bored! :)